Catharticism thy name is me.

Life hasn’t been going the way I planned lately. I’ve been sick virtually all summer. I went to the doctor, they gave me antibiotics, I feel a lot better--but I’m still not 100%. This is summer! I shouldn’t have walking pneumonia!

And don’t get me started on college. Well, actually, I will get started because I want to vent. My complete and total disregard for high school and grades and such has finally caught up to me to a degree.

My plan is to go to junior college for two years or possibly shorter and then transfer to the University of California, Santa Cruz. My favorite place in the world and it has one of the best college radio stations in the country, so it’s all good. That plan is still the same. I just didn’t know where I wanted to go to junior college. There’s a community college right down the road from UCSC, and you can actually make a deal where you go to that junior college, but you live in the dorms of UCSC. Or I can live at home and go to the JC right down the road. I really, really, really wanted to go the JC in Santa Cruz, live in the dorms, etc. I just researched it, and I found out I needed to get a certain GPA in high school in order to do that deal, and I didn’t get that GPA. Alas, that’s a dream that can’t be fulfilled.

Regardless, it’s not the worst thing in the world and I don’t have much of a problem with going to this JC down the road. Except, why is it so immensely difficult and convoluted to sign up for a transfer and some classes? Maybe it’s a sign of this generation, but I so much prefer doing things over the internet. It’s easier because you can do it on your own time and you don’t have to deal with other people that you don’t want to deal with. But, there are so many steps and they’re all disjointed and it’s just so fucking (pardon the language) difficult. This is when I wish I could still talk to my high school counselor. That woman would’ve helped me with this shit.

*sigh* Life’s just not working out like I had hoped right now.

Healthiness here I come...well, not quite.

I have been a hypocrite. I need to establish that. I always used to get pissed at my mom for not going to the doctor when she was ill or not going for ten years, and I would always tell her “I go for every little thing, better safe then sorry.”

Well, I haven’t been keeping up to that lately. I’ve been sick more or less for a few weeks now. Ever since right around graduation time I’ve been not quite right. I’ve had a cough for a week, and I think maybe longer then that. I’ve got so much phlegm, it’s not even funny. Although I don’t know why phlegm would ever be funny anyway.

I’ve been sort of running a fever off and on. I just haven’t been well. Yet, I’ve neglected going to the doctor. And why? Best case scenario, they tell me I have a cold, drink tea and eat lots of soup, and I’ll be fine. And I really doubt it’d be anything worse then that. Maybe the flu or bronchitis even. But still curable and easily treated.

I haven’t had much of an appetite lately, and on the rare occasion I feel hungry, I’ve been eating junk food. Which isn’t terribly outside the ordinary for me, but not smart when I’m healthy, and especially so when I’m sick.

I need to start taking care of myself. I exercise but that’s about the limit of my healthiness. Maybe completely revamping my diet would be a bit drastic right now, but I need to start somewhere and I think that somewhere is the doctor’s office.